Inspirational Journal Week 29

Things  I have done that  I can now laugh about.


I remember when  I was younger, maybe 7 I went out to the park with my dad and sister. There was this concrete hill. That I kept sliding down on. My dad yelled at me to stop because I would get hurt (yeah who would think he cares about me getting hurt right? haha) well the stubborn little girl  I was, I didn't. I don't know how many times I would slide down it but  I do remember leaving the park with my shorts ripped and the red scratches on butt peeking through....

Another time, my sister was babysitting me. She was maybe 10. Well she wasn't paying attention and I cut my bangs...it didn't look to good haha.

Then when I was maybe 13ish. My sister was harrassing me for about a month telling me to say "She won't" with her fist up in the air. I kept saying no. Leave me alone, but I finally got tired of it and said "Fine you won't" Well she did....She punched me right in the face and gave me a black eye. And she didn't get in trouble because  I told her she could...


One time  I wanted to run away...but I wanted to know that they cared. So I waited for my mom to get home to tell her that  I was  leaving.  I had my little suitcase packed, my mom told me no that I needed to stay home and opened my suitcase to not find clothes but to find all of my toys haha I was like 6-7

Two years ago I was in a treatment center. Laureate, which is in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I have never been to OK before,  nor do I know anyone who lives there (well now I do because of the center was local for a lot of girls there) Well one night, I was taking my allowed 15 min walk...The girl who was with me (always needed someone with you) was on the phone. So I ran for it. I had no idea where I was going or what  I would do. I just knew I didn't want to be in treatment anymore. I went through the woods there and somehow lost a shoe and tore my pants pretty bad. The center kept calling me. But  I refused to answer. Then I picked up when the girl I was walking with called me. She was my buddy...I picked up crying saying  I dont know why I did it but I was done. She said she knew but there are other ways to leave treatment. haha after about 6 hours and a hour long phone call I described where I was and they found me and brought me back.

I have done a lot of stupid things, especially when it comes to my ed and it's just like "why?" haha